More Anti-Biotics

So the anti-biotics didn’t work. I went back to the doctor. The doctor gave me stronger anti-biotics, plus medication for yeast infection (the anti-biotics are THAT strong and also I’m prone to aggressive yeast infections because of my PCOS) and some pro-biotics.

Oh boy. I am starting to feel better. But still taking it slow. Its feeling good. It always takes me a while since my sinus and chest infections are stubborn. GRRRRRR.

But I’m trying to take care of myself and take it slow.

Covert Narcissism

My Grandma lately has been thinking that my husband night have borderline personality disorder. My great Aunt thinks he might be dealing drugs. I’m not sure.

I’ve been doing research of my own into narcissism. I think my husband is largely a covert narcissist (think underhanded control freak).

I’m becoming more aware of his games. I see now how sex is just another means to control me. Or lack thereof.

I’m aware, I’m getting educated and when he’s gone I start to come into my own. And yet the minute he walks in the door or talks to me something in me just completely shuts down and I just CAN’T stop the games and my reaction from happening.

I have no idea what to do. As soon as he’s here I’m back to square one, or below even that.

Still making new revelations……………….

Chest Infection

I have a chest infection! Ughhhh. the older I get, the more aggressive and chronic it gets. Both me and my grandma get lots of sinus and chest infections in the winter. I get them in the winter, but the ones that are more stubborn are the ones I get inbetween seasons. Like NOW.

GRRRRRRRR.

NO exercising for me. I tried but its a no go for me.

Some articles say to exercise if you’re moderately sick. Yeah ………… its not working for me.

So I’m gonna take it easy from now on.

But the kidz are doing great. And my son is doing great in his new school. So that is good.

Now if I could just get rid of this infection.

New School!

My son started his new school today! Yikes!

Yesterday I went to a meeting to his old school. We went over his IEP and Behavior plan with this new school. i added some input. And I decided to try this new school because I just couldn’t handle constantly going to pick him up from school, or any more with him getting expelled.

GRRRRRR.

So I went over to the new school. Its known as a “bad” school. Its a school for kidz with behavior problems. His class is small and even has a courtyard thats closed in for him to jump around and run in. (AWESOME.) It looks like because the whole school is more structured, so in a way it gives him more freedom. He didn’t have lots of freedoms at his old school because they couldn’t handle him. Oh boy

I signed out all the paperwork and the secretary gave me a cab pass until bussing starts on Monday. I got to meet some counselors, secretary. I met his teacher and the two aides. And the security guard (IC).I told them all about him and they are all pretty stern – which is good for my son. Hes too good at manipulating hehe, to get his way.

Anyways. Yesterday was a bit rough. I was a bit emotional and overwhelmed lol. The school is a bit intimidating and scary looking but it looks pretty good and the right fit for my son right now. I was just so overwhelmed yesterday and my husband could care less.

He was surprised that he got sent to the “bad school” so fast. But I pushed for it because there was NO progress at his old school. Just a quick decline.

So …………………..

Today was his first day. Apparently he had a rough start but it was smooth sailing after that. I was so glad to hear. But the whole ordeal with my son has just put me on edge. With my speakers broken (cry for me please), I haven’t been able to do ANY stress dancing at all. And its really taken a toll on me. Oh boy.

I’m giving it until next Friday and then I’ll ask them if he needs an aide to follow him. I just found out that theres a program where an aide can shadow a student around school. For those who need it. So if he continues having difficult behaviors then I’m going to try and push for this.

Still emotional, but I’m feeling better about this.